TRAILER OF THE WEEK #3

THE PROWLER (1981)

GOSH-WOW #8

from ALL-STAR COMICS #3 (WINTER 1940)

Links of Shame

We all have them in "Our Favorites". Those links we are ashamed of. The secret links we don't tell anyone about. Links to places on the web that are like the deep, dark places inside ourselves. Guilty pleasures, windows to our true selves, dreams and nightmares.

I don't want you to surf for something funny, something shocking. I can find that shit myself, we all can. I want you to post something real. Something risky. Something you have bookmarked RIGHT NOW. Someplace you lurk online that's like getting a peek inside your diary. Use a fake name - I don't really want to know what came from who. As a gesture of good faith, I'll go first. Name and all.

http://community.livejournal.com/zit_fetish/

Jen

Robotron 2084: Wood Putty For The Gaps In My Plywood Social Life

Often on the weekends, when I'm not engaged in a spirited inner debate on the merits of suicide, I piss away a good portion of my life playing a 25-year old videogame whose premise, like most videogames, is to rescue a bunch of helpless, innocent losers while murdering wave after wave after wave of assholes trying to stab, stomp, and blast me. In the game, you try to hold out for as long as you can, but no matter how skillfully you play the game nor for how long you endure, you are doomed to physically succumb to the evil forces aligned against you. In other words, it's a very realistic simulation. The game is Robotron 2084 and I play it on M.A.M.E., a piece of free, readily available software which enables me and anyone else with nothing better to do to play illegal emulations of copywritten videogame ROMs, the bits of code which compose the actual game. Tonight, after more than two decades of pursuing the proverbial million-point Moby-Dick, I managed to reach a new high score: 940,775. Hoo-fuckin'-ray for me. The current high score world record is held by Brian King of Aurora, CO, a man who, when not engaged in a game of Robotron 2084, must surely wrestle with powerful demons the size of Ted Nugent's ego. A crappy but passable Shockwave version of the game can be played immediately here.

Most Depressing Cartoon?

Which cartoon bummed you out the most as a kid? Super Globetrotters? Rubik the Amazing Cube? or Hammerman?

The Blue Aeroplanes: The Largest Band Roster Ever?

I was perusing the website for a band you will not give a rat's ass about: the Bristol-based Blue Aeroplanes who, in 1990, belched out the incredibly underrated masterpiece (in my opinion), Swagger. A link on their website directs visitors to their Wikipedia page, and (this is the part where you may start to get interested) toward the end of that page, someone has created a spreadsheet illustrating the band's ever-spinning revolving door of personnel. It's on the Spinal Tap scale of ridiculousness. Check it out.

The Overdubbed Rock Performance Videos Of "StSanders"

Finnish YouTube user "StSanders" has created an online name for himself by overdubbing videos of bloated rock performances so they sound exactly like any given moment in Guitar Center. All of his videos can be found here, but the two below are my favorites.

PIZZA TEEN! Readers Poll Results

QUESTION: Your country is in danger of disintegrating. As a concerned citizen, what do you intend to do about it?

• Talk about/write about/read about Apple brand software & devices. 0%
• Furiously masturbate to internet porn. 40%
• Gorge myself on BitTorrented entertainment. 50%
• Get a boob job and/or nose job, charge it on my American Express card. 10%

Be sure to vote in the current poll!