March 06, 2008

10-Second Clips Of Cranky, Faded Celebrities

Prepare yourself, because this is some dark shit, man. Think life sucks? Well, it can't possibly be any worse than having to supplement your income by hopping from one nondescript convention center to another on the autograph circuit. I guess this is the future: no more still photography, just 10-second video clips of life's most banal moments accompanied by the buzz of tedious small talk. Everyone seems so bored or depressed, and the pounding fluorescent lighting sucks the color out of everyone,...even Gary Coleman. "Look, pal, I've heard it all before, so just give me your twenty bucks and shove the glossy up your ass, for all I care. Why do you hate me, God? Why?!" Johnny Whitaker / Butch Patrick Gary Burghoff / Erin Moran Lou Ferigno / Gary Coleman Marc Singer / Joyce DeWitt & Priscilla Barnes

1 comment:

stexe said...

Sitting in a chair, while admirers are willing to give you $20 just to sign your name? Doesn't sound so bad. If anything, it's more depressing to consider the lives of the fans.