October 22, 2007

A Safe Halloween Is A Boring Halloween

I'm blatantly stealing one of the many wonderful videos from this guy's blog. Watch as the narrator utterly destroys this poor kid's Halloween fun while systematically guilting her into dressing as Gandalf The White rather than the classic black witch she wants to be. I say take a chance, kid. Wear whatever the hell you want and don't let this dizzy, paranoid broad psyche you out. There's only about a 15% chance that you will be killed or crippled by an angry, reckless driver. If you survive the night, you will be a stronger person with a great holiday memory. Also, DON'T THROW AWAY THE MASK!!! It may come in handy a few years from now when you are too old to trick-or-treat, but just old enough to hold up a liquor store.


stexe said...

What the hell are these people thinking? Do they want to destroy everything fun about being a kid? Just because their adulthood turned out so disappointing, that doesn't mean they have to stunt the imagination and happiness of their own kids.

Hey adults, fuck you and your reflective tape! And stick this "unicef" box up your ass! I'm not wearing that fuckin' thing around my neck, because it destroys the illusion of my halloween identity! I'm the prince of darkness not a charity-collecting traffic cone, goddammit! Give me just one night to enjoy childhood without you bringing me down! Get off my case, willya?

Lance Ehlers said...

I'm a big fan of pretty girls-- I would even go so far as to say I am a fan of sexy girls-- but I've become disillusioned by the adult incarnation of Halloween because it only seems to be about going as the sexy whatever.

Despite having said that, I would love to see an imaginative young lady with awesome legs dress as the sexy charity-collecting traffic cone.